Martin Higgins Conceptual Anarchist
CONNECT
  • WRITING
    • COMEDY >
      • SISTER CONCEPTOR
      • HAZARDOUS WASTE OF TIME
      • THE IRISH INVENTED RAP
      • POOR DAD
      • BITTER MOON REVIEW
      • PRIMARY CHOLERS
      • INDIA HAS THE BOMB!
      • CREATIVE COLLABORATION
      • I.R.S. CHANGES
      • PETA PRINCIPALS
      • DRUNK DRIVING SCHOOL
      • 2015'S MOST DANGEROUS TOYS
      • STROLLING THE BONEPILE
      • INTOLERABLE!
      • SPIT-SHINE LANGUAGE
      • 100 PORN SWITCHEROO TITLES
      • DANGEROUS TOYS - 2022
    • HORROR >
      • THE EXCHANGE
      • DOES
      • THE DESERT PROJECT >
        • OLEANDER / SIGILS
        • FOOD WATER MAPS
        • TALC
        • ISSUE OF BLOOD PT 1
        • ALTARS AND SHRINES
        • GHOSTS
        • DESERT COMPILATION
    • VIETNAM >
      • ME MAU THAN
      • BRASSO
      • PLYWOOD
      • REMANDED TO THE NAM
      • CHIEU HOI
      • PLYWOOD SLIDESHOW
      • BROTHERS AND BABES IN ARMS
    • NON-FICTION >
      • TURNING ON THE RADIO
      • SHERLOCK AMBASSADOG
    • ARTICLES >
      • SCHADENFREUDE UND GLUCKSCHMERZ
      • GOOD GRIEF
      • COMEDY? THAT'S MY BAG!
      • VEAL IN VEGAS
      • VIDEO PHILOSOPHY
      • KEEPING YOUR TEETH
      • RED SKY IN MOURNING
    • PROFILES >
      • DEEPAK CHOPRA
      • DANNY KALB - BLUES AT THYE OUTSET
      • OTIS TAYLOR
      • DORI MAYNARD
      • DR. EDRICH
      • GOOD GRIEF
      • DR. SACHS
      • MICHAEL KAROLCHYK
      • JOHN CONNOR
      • SCOTT OLSEN
      • DANNY KALB
      • THE SHAME GAME
    • TECHNOLOGY >
      • BLADE RUNNER / LOST IN TRANSLATION
      • MICROSOFT SDK GUIDELINES
      • VIDEO PHILOSOPHY
      • VIDEO SPEECH
      • BRIEF HISTORY OF COMMUNICATION
      • ASYMETRIC MEDIA
    • SCRIPTS >
      • CHURCHBURNER
    • POETRY >
      • THE CHANGELING
      • NEW MEANING
      • THE HOUSE OF DEATH
      • THE CHANGELING
      • A BEGINNING
      • A REMINDER
      • NOT YET LOST
      • CLOTHES I'VE WORN
      • EULOGY FOR MY BROTHER
      • FREE WILL
      • BLESSED B THE HERALD
      • THE DAY AFTER CHRISTMAS
      • DISIDERATA 2016
    • MY COMEDY SONGS >
      • 12 BARS
      • NOTHIN'
      • A FINAL DUET
      • MY LIFE IS JUNK
      • DEMON BARBECUE RIG
      • PAT HARRINGTON
      • NEPHROLOGIST BLUES
  • MEDIA
    • FILM PRODUCTION >
      • MAGIC BOAT / PALOOKA TRAILER
      • COPPOLA, PARKER, HIGGINS
    • VIDEO PRODUCTION >
      • SEATTLE STREET PARTY
      • MJH KATE MULGREW INTERVIEW
      • MJH LUCASARTS INTERVIEWS
      • THE ZOMBIE DANCE
      • KAISER PERMANENTE CFWA
      • C|NET PILOT
      • TRANSAMERICA
      • SCARED STRAY
      • OTIS TAYLOR FREEDOM
      • AERO ANGEL
      • ONSTAGE WITH OTIS TAYLOR
      • SOOT BUGS
      • BAD SANTAS
      • ROUND UP RANCH
      • COAL CREEK SALMON
      • MY BACKYARD
    • AUDIO PRODUCTION >
      • DOES READ
      • COMEDY RADIO DROPS
      • AUDIO SORBETS
      • TALK RADIO HOST
      • RADIO ANNOUNCER
      • THE EXCHANGE
      • HIGGINS AND SPOTTSWOOD ORACLE
      • RADIO SPOTS
      • RADIO GUEST
      • KAROLCHYK AIRCHECK
      • ADAM CURRY / JOHN C. DVORAK
      • HIGGINS / SPOTTSWOOD SCREEN TEST
  • PERFORMANCE
    • STAND-UP >
      • FUNNY BUSINESS DOCUMENTARY
      • FUNNY BUSINESS MJH CLIPS
      • SAN FRANCISCO `82 - `92
      • HOLLYWOOD BAR
      • GINSU KNIFE
      • THE LAMPWICKS
      • ME TIGER
    • BLUE MATERIAL >
      • ABOMNIBLE SNOW WOMAN
  • COMEDY IMAGES
    • ELVIN BISHOP
  • BLOG POSTS
    • LIBERAL GUILT >
      • LOSING LIBERAL FRIENDS
      • TITANIC NEWS
      • THE GELDING OF AMERICA - PT I
      • THE GELDING OF AMERICA - PT II
      • THE PC DISEASE
      • HOW TO KEEP YOUR TEETH
      • A HEN IN THE FOX HOUSE
      • ENMITY OF THE STATE
  • LOVES
    • McLAREN 570S
    • FLYING >
      • MJH WARRIOR
    • TILE PROJECTS
    • FAMILY >
      • FAIRYLAND
      • AYLA RECITAL
      • I THANK YOU
      • AYLA TAPPING
      • AYLA ACAPELLA
      • AYLA DANCE SHOW
      • BALLET
      • BRENNA TRELLIS TOUR
      • AYLA VIOLIN CONCERT
      • PIPPY & CATS
      • MOM AND DAD
      • PADDY AND BARBARA
      • PADDY BOXING
      • KITCHEN REMODEL
      • AYLA RECITAL
    • MUSIC >
      • GUITARS / AMPS / EFFECTS
      • CHAPARELS CARDS
      • PAT HARRINGTON
    • RELIGION >
      • UNIVERSAL LIFE
      • LATTER DAY DUDE
      • TRIBE CERTIFICATE
      • SUBGENIUS
  • CONTACT
    • BACKGROUND C.V.
    • RATES / BIO
    • QUICK LINKS TO PROJECTS
    • COPPOLA PARKER HIGGINS
    • VIETNAM `69 - `70
  • TRANSFER
    • FOR MY DAUGHTER
    • FIX YOUR DIET!
  • L.I. HIGGINS FAMILY
  • MY VOICE SYNTHESIZED

AUDIO SORBETS

​Boulder Liberal Fantasy Camp

​Guide Chimps for the Blind

​Happy Daze Liquors

​​American Architects

​OnStar Pot

OnStar Lisp

Israeli Defense Force Message

Colorado Severe Weather - 1

Colorado Severe Weather - 2

Cherokee Bag Ointment

Self-Igniting Stool Detonator

Kerry Lies


MARTINHIGGINS.COM

     martinhiggins.com is a leisure activity of Halliburton. There, are you happy now?  Go tell all your swampgas, moonbat conspiracy acquaintwnces that you know the real story behind the site. Hell, stage a rally. Carry signs and do that moronic "Hey-hey, Ho-ho, martinhiggns.com has got to go!" horsecrap.
 
     Forty goddamned years of stanky, rag-assed numbskulls protesting in the streets and you'd think those shmucks could think up a couple new chants? 

     I will read your emails, correct your spelling, comment on your inept use of grammar and that damned predilection to used tired clichés. (e.g., "I think I just threw up in my mouth a little!")

     Maybe... MAYBE I'll post your 2 cents worth. (probably an over estimation of worth at this point.) if it's funny, makes a brilliant point or is so laughably illiterate we can't help turning it into a piece of postable mockery.


     If you enter one of my contests and win a prize, you'll receive it with a week or two unless you start pestering me, then you'll be shit out-of-luck. This isn't FedEx, Friend. 

​      If you are an Inflato-American and you want to rag my ass about your YOUR fat ass and how it's your right/pride/genetic disorder/only fault/post-partum tummy/thyroid acting up - save it for someone who cares - call Rosie O' or Oprah. They're both in the phone book between Obese Auto Detailing and Overweight Porta-San Service. 


     martinhiggins.com is an Equal Opportunity employer. We have as many women as men working here and will definitely hire some Samoans and Fan Dancers as soon as our lawyer says we have to.

Got a question, gripe, or hot tip on 
the ponies?  Tell me all about it!

    I don't share email addresses or underwear...

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