Martin Higgins Conceptual Anarchist
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Ayla. Mikey, Ruth, Bruce, Family, and Friends…
Thank you all for being here on this glorious day.
I’m so happy my Princess found her Prince.

Weeks ago, Ayla and Mikey told me to “be myself” today. I have 32 years of Ayla memories in video, photos, and slides, so I decided on doing a TED Talk styled slide show. I even got a sponsor to help pay for the speech.
READING FROM LINER CARD (Clear throat)
“This Dad Speech is brought to you by The Shashkeen, Manchester’s four-star Irish Pub. Wednesdays are Punk Music Night featuring Pete Bogg and The Bloody Idjits! And all double drinks are triple priced. Remember, at The Shashkeen - you’re only a stranger once - when the cops come looking for you! Slainte’!”

All RIGHTY! Here we go: I did put together a slide show together, but I forgot I don’t have a projector or screen. So, please bear with me.

SLIDE CLICK: Here we are at San Francisco Hospital in '91. And there’s newborn Ayla, swaddled a blanket and cradled in Laura’s arms.
SLIDE CLICK: That’s me on the floor, being revived by a nurse. When Laura went into labor, I fainted dead away and went down for the count.
SLIDE CLICK: 1993, two year-old Ayla likes to scream AAH! to get our attention. We laugh and nickname her “Screech Bird.”
SLIDE CLICK: Here’s Laura regretting the nickname when concerned neighbors call the police.
SLIDE CLICK: Ayla, now six, joins the Rainbow Girls and earns the rank of Busy Bee — a natural leader.
SLIDE CLICK: A year later, she’s named Supreme Commander of the Rainbow Girls during the Cookie Turf War against The Brownies.
SLIDE CLICK: Eight-year-old Ayla discovers Nintendo and Pokémon. She says, “Gotta’ Catch `Em All, DAD!”
SLIDE CLICK: At a game store, I buy Pokémon cards, Pikachu Dolls, Pikachu posters, Pokemon toothbrushes. Pokemon cyclone fencing, Pokemon Snow tires, a Pokemon Chainsaw... anything with a Pokemon on it...
SLIDE CLICK: At a Pokémon convention, I pick up the N64 console, all the games, including Super Mario Kart.
SLIDE CLICK: Here’s Ayla learning to type and helping “Putt-Putt” get to the Moon on one of the first pink Barbie Computers.
SLIDE CLICK: Ayla goes wild over the Power Puff Girls Bubbles, Blossom, and Buttercup. Wasn’t your favorite Blossom?
SLIDE CLICK: This is me at Bank of America, taking out a second mortgage.
SLIDE CLICK: Ah! Me and Laura in our Hot Tub… OOOPS! How did THAT slide get in there?
SLIDE CLICK: 2017. Ayla meets Mikey at Stolid. She says, “He’s special, Dad! He’s a salesman and a musician… and he has a dog!
I think, “I hope he’s a good guy.” and “I hope it’s not a Chihuahua!”
SLIDE CLICK: I meet Mikey. He IS a persuasive salesman. Within 10 minutes, he talks me into buying a 1970 Gremlin with a piece of clothesline holding the passenger door shut. He even helps me take over payments.
SLIDE CLICK: Here’s Ayla and Mikey, dressed all in green, smiling blissfully… as they watch the Celtics stomp the Knicks.
SLIDE CLICK: The beautiful wedding invitation Ayla made. Magnificent!
SLIDE CLICK: Here, she is creating our beautiful floral arrangements.
SLIDE CLICK: Ayla, in her carpentry workshop, building the tables and chairs you’re sitting on. Souvenir Wedding Chairs - $30.
SLIDE CLICK: Mikey and I toss back a few shots as he explains the groomsmen will wear matching tweed suits. He suggests I wear a matching suit, too. I agree.
SLIDE CLICK: Here’s me signing the contract Mikey wrote up to rent me a tweed suit. What a salesman!
SLIDE CLICK: The personalized vinyl record Mikey produced. It only cost $30! Such a deal!
SLIDE CLICK: This is me listening to the $30 record on the $900 HiFi and turntable system I had to buy!
SLIDE CLICK: The Morrison Coat of Arms. Courage, Loyalty, Pride, and Honor that harkens back to Olaf the Black… who was possibly of Viking descent. Famous Morrisons? Jim, Van, and Marion Morrison - better known as John Wayne. Quite an impressive clan.
SLIDE CLICK: The Higgins Heraldic Crest - Ingenuity, Patriotism, Storytelling, and Humor – especially when Humor can prompt someone to buy the next round.
Famous Higginses include Michael Higgins, president of Ireland. Professor Henry Higgins, who studied “The Rain in Spain,” and Lucky, the Magic Charms Leprechaun, who claims he is “magically delicious.”
SLIDE CLICK: and, of course, my Great Uncle, Mr. Potatohead – who recently removed his mustache, changed his pronouns, and moved to Seattle. Who will look after his grandkids - the Tater Tots?
SLIDE CLICK: Higgins is an anglicized version of the Gaelic O’hUigin, meaning son of a Viking.
Ayla and Mikey’s distant ancestors were 12th-century Sea Pirates who invaded and looted the British Isles, then fell in love with the place and moved into the neighborhood. Look out, Manchester.
Enough with the slides. My thumb is getting tired.
Now I’ll tell you my story.
Ayla and I moved here from Denver seven years ago after we lost Laura – my wife and her mother. Our hearts were heavy, and we wanted a fresh start.
We know that our children walk on into a future we may never see. Somewhere, in the heaven we pray for, Laura watches her daughter choose a good man, a strong man, a kind man, to walk beside her all her life.
Mikey, I have no son. But if I did, I’d want him to be as steady-handed, moral, and faithful as you have demonstrated yourself to be during these past years.
I refer to you two as Lord and Lady and I mean that from my heart. For you are royalty. My royalty. OUR royalty. (to the Audience} AM I RIGHT?
Today, our families have become as ONE – joined in the heartfelt knowledge that this Man and this Woman have chosen their life partner wisely.
Lord and Lady, you can count on me to always stand by you.
I love you both.